Date: Sat, 20 Sep 1997 13:48:58 -0400 From: "Kathleen Wolenczak" To: "FF-List" Subject: (sQ-ff) Pinni 2 (needs a better name, but at least it's spellable) 1 Message-Id: <199709201802.NAA20993@stgenesis.org> Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1 MIME-Version: 1.0 X-MIME-Autoconverted: from 8bit to quoted-printable by stgenesis.org id MAA05586 Pinnipedia is available at : http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Lair/4286/ ---Fan-Fic page. Part One. Wednesday, August 10, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Crew Mess 12:17 P.M. Lieutenant (j.g.) Anthony Piccolo, Lieutenant Tim O’Neill, and Commander Ford are sitting around a circular table, listening to Tony’s go-nowhere story about picking up a girl while on the shore leave he just returned from moments ago. Lucas walks into the busy room in silence, picks up a tray heaped with food, and walks to a table near his friends’, though he doesn’t seem to notice Tony’s wild gestures and loud, excited voice. Ford looks over at Lucas who is, as usual, uncomplaining despite obvious unhappiness. “Hey, Lucas, want to join us?” Lucas looks up and tucks his hair behind his ear, trying to, at all costs, avoid eye contact. “Nah, I’m okay....” Lucas sighs and briefly looks up at the Commander “I just want to be alone for a little while.” Ford nods, shrugging. “We’re here if you change your mind.” Lucas nods absently, looking down at his meal. Ford turns back to Tim and whispers, out of Lucas’ range of hearing. “_Now_ do you see what I mean, Tim?” Tim nods, looking passed Tony to the young man at the table behind him. Lucas remains lean and muscular, having not let up on his exercise at _all_. His hair is quickly growing out, almost as it was when seaQuest II was first commissioned. Tony leans forward, obscuring Tim’s view of Lucas. Tony whispers fiercely into the middle of the table, hiding the venom in his voice with only mild success. “What the hell is wrong with him, anyway? He hasn’t played poker with us since, like, the _day_ after he got back, all he does besides work is sleep, eat, and exercise in the gym.” Tim sighs deeply. “Give him some time, Tony, he’s only been back a few weeks, and he still needs to readjust after being on Coronado for so long.” “What’s the big deal, though, it’s just training camp. Jim was a SEAL and he never acted like a total jerk...” Ford half shrugs. “I think it affects different kinds of people in different ways. Maybe Lucas wasn’t suited for the kind of life there and he had to make some serious adjustments to himself. Now he’s just gotta find a way back. It was his life for a _long_ time.” “Y’know, I don’t think he’s been on his computer since he got back.” Ford and Tim look up, finding each other’s eyes with equally concerned expressions. Tim turns to Lucas. “Hey, Lucas.” The young man doesn’t respond, just stares into his lunch, his gaze unmoving. Tim slips from his chair and moves to Lucas’ side, laying a hand on Lucas’ shoulder. “Lucas?” Again Lucas doesn’t move. Tim leans down and looks at Lucas’ eyes. He’s staring straight ahead, but he’s seeing something miles away, on an island off the coast of California. * Lucas walks across the sand with the rest of his teammates, weary with exhaustion and weak with hunger. He sees the cooks from the Mess Hall standing beside metal garbage cans lined with black plastic bags. Their lids are lifted and Lucas, ravaged with hunger, grabs a plate of cold semi-food, fighting over it a moment, then, using his bare hands, feeds himself cold vegetables and meat and potatoes. He drops to his knees on the beach, too hungry to care about anything more. * “Lucas?” Lucas looks up in the Mess Hall, finding Tim almost kneeling beside him, and Ford and Piccolo staring at him from a few feet away. Confused, he manages a small voice. “What?” “You okay?” “Yeah, just...” Lucas looks for something to say, an excuse, anything to cover up his flashback. “...thinking. What’s up?” “Well, we were talking and we were wondering if you’ve used your computer since you got back to _seaQuest_.” “Yeah, I have. Not a lot, though.” Tim nods. “That’s all we were wondering. You can go back to eating now.” Tim gently gestures with his hand, encouraging Lucas to continue his meal uninterrupted. Lucas nods and tentatively takes another bite of pasta, sighing softly. Tim looks knowingly at Ford and Piccolo, sitting down. He whispers. “Something’s up.” Ford and Tony nod. End Part One. Copyright Kathleen Brown, September 1997. ---------------------------------------- Date: Sat, 20 Sep 1997 13:49:01 -0400 From: "Kathleen Wolenczak" To: "FF-List" Subject: (sQ-ff) Pinni 2 2 Message-Id: <199709201802.NAA21004@stgenesis.org> Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1 MIME-Version: 1.0 X-MIME-Autoconverted: from 8bit to quoted-printable by stgenesis.org id MAA05586 Anything not copyright Amblin/Universal/Scifi is copyright me. Part Two. August 10, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Gym 8: 50 P.M. Ford walks in, a towel around his shoulders, ready for a light workout to move through his daily frustrations as the head of the military team aboard the UEO’s flagship. As he enters through the doorway he stops, staring. His ankles wrapped around a bar welded to the wall, Lucas is doing an exercise not unlike sit-ups, going from completely stretched out to almost completely folded in half. He’s dressed in long cutoff sweatpants and a gray SEAL-issue T-shirt. His knee is wrapped in a simple supportive brace but his injury doesn’t seem to be giving him any pain. Lucas is working quickly, and each time he moves away from himself, his shirt slips down until it hits his folded arms, exposing his firm, straining abdominal muscles. Lucas is coated in a thin layer of sweat but is enjoying his exercise. It’s easy and comfortable, it’s something he can trust to be there when he needs time to think. Ford gapes, openmouthed, as Lucas reaches up with both his hands and grabs the bar, giving himself enough slack to free his ankles. Then, without touching the floor, begins to perform pull-ups. Ford walks into the room, watching this young man he watched grow from boyhood perform exercises even Jonathan himself could not handle. Ford unobtrusively clears his throat and walks in. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone work so hard before.” Lucas smiles and pulls his body upward again, continuing. Ford sits on a weight-training platform. “Mind if I share the room?” Lucas doesn’t switch his concentration away from the task at hand. “Not at all, Commander. I’d enjoy the company.” Later on, Lucas is on the floor, doing push-ups using only his right arm, his legs spread. Ford is too amazed by Lucas to exercise right now. He marvels at the fact that for five months, up until several weeks ago, Lucas’ wrist was broken, but now, he acts as if it was nothing at all. Lucas switches to use both his hands for support, then takes up his right hand, exercising his left side. Lucas smiles, knowing Ford is looking at him. “You look surprised, Commander.” Ford is taken aback by that. “Well, only as much as I’d be if I saw Dagwood hack UEO codes.” “I’m glad you have so much faith in my abilities.” “No, that’s not what I meant, Lucas....” Lucas smiles and finishes his set, sitting back on his heels, then standing, pleasantly sore. He picks up a towel and dries off his face. “It’s okay.” Lucas grins at the Commander’s discomfort. “I know what you meant. A year ago I wouldn’t’ve believed I could do it either.” Lucas shakes his head, thinking back and amazed by all he’s done. “God, a _year_. Doesn’t seem like that long.” Lucas takes a long drink from a thermos of icy water. He smiles. “I always wondered why seaQuest doesn’t have a pool. I mean, Darwin’s, yeah, but, I mean, one for us. We deserve it, don’t we?” Lucas smiles, grinning widely at his awestruck companion. “Good night, Commander.” Lucas leaves. Ford stares at the doorway. “Good night, Lucas.” August 10, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Men’s Shower, Crew’s Quarters 9:25 P.M. Lucas is standing facing the back wall of the shower, both his arms braced, supporting his body firmly as his searing hot shower rushes over him. He’s steaming up the entire room, effectively ruining the ion path in any “dry” showers, but, fortunately, no one’s there to complain. Lucas runs a hand through his hair and braces his hand back against the wall, sighing deeply, his eyes closed. Someone taps his left shoulder and he hangs his head, frustrated. “C’mon, I only got two minutes left on this ration, let me enjoy them...” Tim smiles. “I got a shift in a half hour, just so you know.” Lucas turns around and smiles. “Hey Tim. Like I said, I only got a couple minutes left in here.” “No problem.” Lucas folds his arms across the low top of the shower stall door, resting his cheek on his skin as the water pounds across his back. Tim looks at Lucas, smiling, but jealous, too. “Man, I wish I had the kind of ration you’ve got.” “Hey, once you get used to something there’s _no_ turning back....” Pleased by his shower, Lucas smiles and closes his eyes briefly. Tim nods, his voice undertoned with darkness. “So I’ve noticed.” Lucas looks up, startled. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Tim looks up at Lucas. “What happened to you on that island that now you’re a completely different person? I’m used to the innocent guy who spent all his time wanting attention and spending all his time on the ‘Nex. Now you’re this...” Tim struggles to find a word hurtful enough to convey his _own_ pain. “...this _soldier_ who spends all his time exercising and wants _nothing_ to do with me or anybody else.” Lucas looks a little ashamed. His shower shuts off automatically and he gets out of the stall, grabbing a nearby towel and wrapping it around his waist. “Tim, you’ve got no idea what I’ve been put through. I’m still the same person inside, just as vulnerable, just as lonely, but it’ll be some time before I can shake off what happened enough to be able to trust you guys again.” “Why can’t you trust us?” “I don’t know. I’m sorry, Tim....” Lucas trails off, sadly shaking his head. Lucas starts to leave, but Tim turns to face his retreating form. “Hey.” Lucas turns back. “Tell that person inside of you that I miss him.” Lucas nods, looking ready to crack. “He misses you, too, Tim. He can’t come out yet, though.” Lucas manages a weak smile. “He’s too afraid he’ll hear Commander Haskill screaming at him again.” Tim nods, understanding that Lucas is feeling trapped within himself, having been through such terror and pain that he can’t open up again, held inside by an irrational fear that remains all _too_ real. Lucas gives Tim a wistful ‘I wish I could’ look and leaves quietly. Tim sighs. End Part Two. Copyright Kathleen Brown, September 1997. ---------------------------------------- Date: Sun, 21 Sep 1997 12:32:10 -0400 From: "Kathleen Wolenczak" To: "FF-List" Subject: (sQ-ff) Pinni 2 3 Message-Id: <199709211713.MAA05402@stgenesis.org> Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1 MIME-Version: 1.0 X-MIME-Autoconverted: from 8bit to quoted-printable by stgenesis.org id RAA22015 Anything not copyright Amblin/Universal/Scifi is copyright me. Part Three. August 11, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Lieutenant (j.g.) Lucas Wolenczak’s Quarters 1 AM. Lucas is lying in his bed, curled up under the covers, asleep and dreaming. * On Coronado, an exhausted Lucas is drifting somewhere in the twilight between consciousness and sleep, his body, having been battered in every way imaginable, screaming in pain with every effort, even one as small as a single breath of air. Haskill enters with another commander, whose only purpose is to roll large sticks which look like dynamite, but are merely glorified firecrackers, down the hall and into the barracks where the young men are sleeping. The explosion is sudden and Haskill immediately shoots several rounds off an assault rifle, knocking the recruits out of their beds with sound. * In Lucas’ quarters, he wakes, gasping in terror. That was the start of Hell Week on Coronado. Sighing and pushing at his hair, he lays back, trying to push the thought from his mind. His breathing gradually slows and he sighs, looking into the aqua-tunnel beside his bed, watching the light and water trace patterns on the inside. He sighs deeply and slips from his bed, pulling on a pair of jeans and slinking into the hallway. In SeaDeck, Lucas sits quietly beside the moon pool, petting Darwin slowly. “Lucas mind pictures hurt?” Sometimes the dolphin’s sixth sense about certain things is downright _scary_. Lucas nods, still petting Darwin’s back. “Lucas swim?” “It’s too late right now, Darwin...” “Lucas is tired. Lucas should sleep.” “I can’t sleep, Darwin.” There’s a quiet, soft voice behind Lucas. “Why?” Lucas turns and smiles. There, in the doorway, is Dagwood, in all his innocence. Lucas immediately regrets this thought, his dread of having to explain to Dagwood _and_ Darwin what is happening, especially with his wearied state and the unfathomable difference between the intelligence levels between them. Lucas sighs and looks into the pool and, predictably, Dagwood comes closer. Lucas reaches his arm into the water and finds himself missing life on Coronado. “Bad dreams, Dagwood.” “Oh.” Lucas looks at Dagwood, feeling lower than the dirt beneath his feet -- *it’d be a good metaphor if we were on the Island....* -- and sighs. Without another word to contribute to his guilt, he walks out, his shoulders bowed with grief and guilt and loneliness. August 11, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Bridge 11:36 PM Lucas is quietly working, in uniform, performing his lonely, tearfully routine job to the best of his ability. From the command chair, Hudson turns to Lieutenant O’Neill’s soft beckon. “Sir, I’ve got a commlink from MedBay, it’s Doctor Eliot. She says it’s about Lucas and requests it be kept on a private connection.” Hudson nods and picks up a headset, listening without putting it on. Over the link comes a small female voice. “Sir, I’ve had six crew members come to me concerned over Lieutenant Wolenczak’s mental health and well-being. I’d like to see him as soon as possible.” Hudson nods softly, glancing at Lucas. “That can be arranged.” “Wonderful, Sir, thank you.” Hudson nods and, flipping a button on his console, terminates the connection. He turns to Lucas. “Lieutenant Wolenczak.” Lucas looks up, curious. “You’re wanted in MedBay.” Lucas looks down at his station, preoccupied. “Lieutenant, did you hear me?” “Yes, Sir.” “_Now_, lieutenant.” Lucas looks up. “Let me finish my shift, Sir.” “_Now_. You may finish your shift after you see to your health.” “Not now, Sir, I’ll attend to it later. My health is my concern and no one else’s, I’ll treat it’s importance as I see fit.” “The health of a critical crew member affects everyone on this boat, Lieutenant.” Lucas is matter of fact, taking this argument very seriously. “I’m not going, Sir.” “You’re acting like a child.” Lucas takes offense to that, he’s been defending himself against this since he came aboard seaQuest. “I’m not a child.” “That is an _order_, Lieutenant Wolenczak, go down to MedBay.” “No!” The Bridge crew stares at this spectacle, privately choosing their sides, deciding who is more right. Hudson stands, walking to face Lucas. His voice calms. “Are you disobeying an order, Mr. Wolenczak?” Lucas searches for a way out. “No, Sir, I’m merely....postponing my compliance to it.” “You can’t do that.” Ford steps forward. “Sir...” Hudson turns abruptly. “Commander Ford, take Lieutenant Wolenczak to the Brig where we will continue this discussion in private.” “Captain....” “Are _you_ disobeying my order, too? Will I have to put _you_ in the Brig as well?” Ford sighs. “No, Sir.” Ford stands and walks to Lucas, who makes no move to get up. “C’mon, Lieutenant.” Lucas sighs deeply. He’s angry and pleading. “No. I’m not going anywhere until I finish my shift.” “_Now_, Lucas!” Lucas calms. “No.” Ford grabs Lucas’ arm and pulls him to his feet. Lucas wrenches away, firmly, almost upsetting Ford’s balance. “NO! Let me finish my shift!” In a fury, Lucas hooks his ankle around the commander’s and pull his foot sharply toward him, meanwhile pushing at the commander’s chest, throwing him off balance. Ford falls heavily to his back. Lucas does nothing more, though with the training he’s had he knows he could easily crack the commander and turn him against Hudson in his desperation to escape from the pain Lucas would inflict. Lucas looks at Ford in fear. “Please, commander...... Please?” Tim stands. “Sir... Just let him--” Hudson glares at O’Neill, furious. Hudson hits a comm button and calls for security. Almost instantaneously three rather large men enter the Bridge. Lucas sighs softly. Hudson looks at the men and nods in Lucas’ direction. “Take Lieutenant Wolenczak to the Brig.” Ford stands, having fully recovered. Lucas sighs as he allows himself to be led away by the team of men. Ford walks over to Hudson and sighs. “I have never seen anyone so afraid in my entire life.” “He knew what he was doing.” Ford sighs and brushes himself off. “Captain, that was UEO training and terror mixed together. He knows too much for his own good. He knows how to fight and infiltrate Chaodai waters, but he doesn’t know how to control _himself_. Sir, he’s scared; that’s his only motivation. The Lucas Wolenczak I know would never in his right mind hurt _anyone_ unless it was to protect his own life.” Hudson sighs softly. “The Lucas Wolenczak you know died on Coronado Island.” End Part Three. Copyright Kathleen Brown, September 1997. ---------------------------------------- Date: Sun, 21 Sep 1997 12:31:59 -0400 From: "Kathleen Wolenczak" To: "FF-List" Subject: (sQ-ff) Pinni 2 4 Message-Id: <199709211713.MAA05390@stgenesis.org> Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1 MIME-Version: 1.0 X-MIME-Autoconverted: from 8bit to quoted-printable by stgenesis.org id MAA05586 Anything not copyright Amblin/Universal/Scifi is copyright me. Part Four. August 11, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Brig 2:07 PM Lucas is lying on the bunk in the plain room, asleep. In the corridor outside the Brig, Hudson walks up and nods to the security detail. They glance at the surveillance monitor, and, satisfied Lucas hasn’t moved in the past hour, open the door for Hudson. Hudson enters, angry, but, seeing Lucas sleeping so soundly, so innocently, he finds himself momentarily second-guessing his actions. When was the last time he’d put a crew member in the Brig for desperately wanting to do his job? Usually that kind of behavior pleased Hudson. Why was he so angry now? Sighing, Hudson finds a comfortable place to stand and watch Lucas sleep. However, it is less than ten minutes before Lucas stirs, awoken by a twinge of hunger in his belly. Seeing Hudson standing there, looking thoroughly displeased, Lucas panics, jumping from his bed and beginning to slowly pace along the back wall of the room. Hudson sighs. “Lucas, nothing’s going to happen to you. You can go back to work if you’ll just talk to Doctor Eliot, she’s worried about you. Everyone on this _boat_ is worried about you, Lieutenant.” “I’m fine. I just wanna go back to work.” “I can’t let you do that.” “Why?” “You’re not well....” Hudson sighs. “Because you won’t let me do my job!!” Lucas is frantic, trying to explain something no one seems to understand. “My job is the only thing that keeps me going! When I’m not working, I’m exercising, and I’m too _tired_ to keep on doing that!! I want to go to work!!” “But why can’t you just _rest_, Lucas?!” “I _can’t_!!!” Hudson gazes at the panicked young man, who’s pacing the wall, nearly psychotic in his fear and desperation. “Lucas, you can’t work, you’re a nervous wreck. You need some time to rest. You’re exhausted.” Lucas is now screaming at the top of his lungs. “Let me go to work!!!” *Why won’t he listen?!* Hudson stands at attention, yelling loudly, but his emotions in control. He’s testing Lucas. Trying to find out what’s wrong. “Lieutenant Wolenczak!” Lucas stops and stares; he’s never heard Hudson yell before.... “Are you giving an order to a superior officer?!” Lucas stands at attention, staring forward. “No, Sir!” Hudson steps closer to Lucas. “You will obey my orders without question, Lieutenant!” “Yes, Sir!” “Was that a hesitation I heard, Lieutenant?!” “No, Sir!” Hudson steps closer to Lucas, yelling in his ear. “Drop!” Lucas looks out of the corner of his eye at Hudson, unmoving. Hudson grabs Lucas’ arm and pulls straight down, pulling Lucas along for the ride. “I said DROP, Lieutenant, do you not understand what that means?!” Lucas gets down on his hands and knees on the floor. He’s stoic. “WELL?! You know how to do this, Lieutenant, get goin’!” Hudson kicks Lucas’ knee out from under him, realizing too late that it is Lucas’ injured side. Lucas doesn’t complain, merely winces. “MOVE!!” Lucas begins doing push-ups. They come easy to him, he does many every day. Lucas doesn’t get exhausted easy, which is why it takes an hour of being badgered into powerful exercise before he’s ready to quit. Hudson doesn’t give him an inch of slack, yelling the moment Lucas hesitates. Hudson is tired, too, feeling awful about causing this young man such pain. Lucas is soaked in sweat and shaking from the constant assault of adrenaline on him. “Are you TIRED, Lieutenant?! Do you want to quit on me?!” “No, Sir!” “Then _move_, I’ve seen boys fresh out of college work harder than this!” Lucas keeps working, his chest burning in pain. “Had enough?!” “No, Sir!” “If you ever wanna see that little dolphin of yours again you’re gonna have to do better than this!” Lucas works a with greater strength of purpose, pushing himself passed the limits of his endurance and beyond. Ten minutes later Lucas is still working, tears pouring down his cheeks and shaking almost too hard to keep control of himself. He slows considerably, without warning. Hudson steps back from Lucas, sighing. “You’re done, Lieutenant.” Lucas looks up at Hudson, wiping the tears from his cheeks. Hudson nods. “You’re done. I’ll have someone escort you to the head, then I’ll order you up a meal or two. Once you’ve had a while to rest, Doctor Eliot’s coming down and you _are_ gonna talk to her, right Lieutenant?” Lucas nods, sitting back on his feet. “Isn’t there a rule in this man’s Navy that says you’re supposed to stand at attention unless specifically told otherwise?” Lucas struggles against his exhaustion, forcing himself to his feet. In the end, however, he only succeeds in collapsing into Hudson’s arms, too exhausted to cry. He’s shivering from shock, exhaustion, and the remaining adrenaline. Hudson holds Lucas up on his feet, though he must hold him tightly against his chest, a move which Lucas takes as affectionate. Lucas has no desire to work anymore, he’d be happy simply to rest here for a while. His voice is small, weak, and shaken. “Did I do well, captain? I did my best....” “You did just fine, Lieutenant.” Hudson smiles a split second, then slips seamlessly back into his role as captain. “Better than anyone I’ve trained.” “Even J.J.?” Hudson smiles, touched that this is Lucas’ first comparison. “Yes, even her.” Lucas sighs deeply. August 11, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Men’s Head, Security Corridor 3:30 PM. Lucas is leaning over a sink, eagerly drinking the icy running water from his cupped hand. He’s oblivious to everything around him, ignoring the far-off pleas from his security escort, lost in a dream or rather, a nightmare. * On Coronado, they walked from the beach carrying their inflatable boats, awaiting further instruction. ‘You have four minutes to get chow and be back.’ Lucas and his crew ran to the Mess Hall, fighting and scrambling for food, some guys even throwing punches, while Lucas reaches his hand in and grabs a wilted paper plate and a small carton of two-days- from-expiration milk. Lucas eats, starving, ripping open his carton of milk and pouring it down his throat. Sighing, gagging, he leans against a table and watches his almost-friends tear each other apart, wild for food. *This is hell...they’re so desperate for something to eat that they’d kill for it. This is torture...* * In the head, Lucas keeps drinking. Tony walks in and smiles at Lucas after giving his security escort a look like ‘who the hell are you? Leave the poor guy alone.’. Tony smiles at Lucas. “Hey, Luke, what’re you doin’?” Lucas turns, holding his arm outstretched, smacking hard into Tony’s chest, sending him sprawling to the deck. Lucas goes back to drinking, shaking once again. His security officer walks over and gently takes Lucas’ shoulders. “Wolenczak, c’mon...” Lucas pulls away, frightened, wanting to keep going. The officer pulls Lucas away again, a little firmer this time. “C’mon, Lieutenant, it’s different here. You don’t need to stock up, you can eat and drink whenever you want. It’s okay....” Lucas looks up at him, his bright, young eyes wide and innocent. “Are you sure?” “I’m positive, Lucas. C’mon.” Tony stands up, not angry, rather, worried about his friend. He looks to the large officer who is so tenderly holding this frail, broken, young man. “What’s wrong with him?” “I don’t know, Piccolo...” The man leads Lucas out, and Tony considers what has just happened. End Part 4 Copyright Kathleen Brown, September 1997. ---------------------------------------- Date: Mon, 22 Sep 1997 17:14:04 -0400 From: "Kathleen Wolenczak" To: "FF-List" Subject: (sQ-ff) Pinni 2 5 Message-Id: <199709222153.QAA12494@stgenesis.org> Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit Anything not copyright Amblin/Universal/Scifi is copyright me. Part 5 August 11, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Captain Hudson’s Quarters 3:30 PM. Hudson is in his quarters, alone, with Doctor Eliot. She is a tiny woman, dark brown hair, brown eyes. She’s very gentle, but also capable of rage when she needs to be. She’s listening quietly to Hudson’s perception of Lucas’ problem. “He refused to listen to me. That is, until I started treating him like a soldier. I proved to him that I am just as much an officer as the men on Coronado were, and then he listened to me without question.” “What are you suggesting?” “That once he saw what life as a SEAL was like, he fell in love with it. It’s a life he wants to live every day of his life and refuses to give up. He’s reliving it every moment of the day, it’s where he wants to be.” “Captain, his memories are causing him a lot of pain. His constant exercise is breaking him down physically and mentally. It’s not healthy.” “What do you suggest I do? Take away the one outlet in his life that brings him joy?” “Sir, it’s not joy. It’s something to distance himself from his loss.” “What ‘loss’?” “The loss of the one thing that’s made him feel like he’s worth something. He’s ignoring the fact he’s not on Coronado and as long as he is, he’ll never get well and he’ll never be able to find something _real_ to make him happy.” “I’ve never seen anyone so desperate for something to make them happy.... Coronado made him happy, even though every moment was pure hell, he was important and, God, he was happy.” “What is he now, Sir?” Hudson looks at her a moment, then presses a button on a SEAPOC on his desk, pulling up the live feed of the surveillance in the Brig. Lucas is alone, eating quietly. Hudson sighs deeply. “He’s alone.” Hudson sighs again. “I told the security detail he wasn’t a risk. I told them to call you if there was any problems, and said that if he asks for anything, he should get it.” She nods. “I’d like to postpone talking to him in a therapy setting for a while. I want him to be comfortable first.” “What do you mean?” “I’m going to take him down to SeaDeck to talk to Darwin...” August 12, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- SeaDeck 10 AM. Lucas is lying across a platform to the side of the moon pool, playing an impromptu game of fetch with Darwin, as well as “Splash Lucas”, which is simply, as the name states, Darwin splashing Lucas. Lucas is lying on his belly, his chin resting on his right forearm as his left hand lightly caresses Darwin’s chin. He smiles and props himself up on his elbows, laughing softly as Darwin finally retrieves their toy of choice, a tennis ball. The texture amazes Darwin. Lucas takes the ball from Darwin and tosses it off the side of the pool close to Doctor Eliot, splashing into the water which splashes onto her. she turns to them as Darwin swims to retrieve the ball from the tricky location. Lucas smiles at her. “Oops?” “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” “Isn’t that the idea?” “Good point, Lucas.” He smiles and goes back to playing with Darwin, sitting up. He’s wearing a sweater and corduroy pants, both baggy, both worn and soft and comfortable. Doctor Eliot stands and walks across the room to Lucas, sitting beside him. “Lucas?” He doesn’t look at her, he’s preoccupied with Darwin. “Hmmm?” “Do you miss Coronado?” He nods softly. “Why?” He looks at her. “You’re asking me to explain why I was happier there than anyplace else.” “Yes.” He is lost in thought. “I could do things I never thought I could do before... I made friends....I accomplished things without anyone’s help.... I proved to myself that I can do well by myself, without my father or Captain Bridger or Hudson pulling strings for me. It was someplace where I could be alone....and for the first time since college I felt a challenge. It was wonderful.” “Why don’t you ever stop exercising?” “Because I don’t _want_ to stop. It makes me happy, too.” “You’re going to get really hurt, Lucas.” “I don’t care. It’s bound to happen anyway so it might as well happen under _my_ rules...” “Aren’t you worried?” “Why? What is there other than the way I’m living now? I’m miserable....” He sighs deeply. “I can’t be a SEAL, I can’t do what I most wanna do, so what’s the harm in me getting hurt? Maybe I’ll get hurt so bad I’ll get kicked out of the Navy. I wouldn’t mind the time alone....” She looks at him, closely. “I can help you, Lucas.” “No.” He gets up and walks out of the open, airy room. “I just wanna be alone.” August 12, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Lieutenant (j.g.) Lucas Wolenczak’s Quarters 4 PM Tim gently knocks on the door and, finding no response, walks in. Lucas is lying on the floor, doing sit-ups. “May I interrupt?” “No.” “ ‘No’?” Tim stares at Lucas, then grins and walks over, sitting on his bed. “Tough. I’m doing it anyway.” “Go away, please.” “No. I wanna talk, and since I’ve decided you’re _never_ going to stop exercising, now’s as good a time as any.” Lucas doesn’t stop his workout. Tim is growing frustrated with him. He gently touches Lucas’ shoulder, the young man jerks away from him. “Lucas, c’mon, let up a minute.” “No.” “_Lucas_...” “NO!” Tim slides down onto the floor, grabbing Lucas’ shoulders and pushing them to the floor, staring down into Lucas’ face. Lucas lays there in silence, shaking. Tears pour unchecked down his face, eventually bringing Lucas to loud, forceful sobbing. He covers his face with both hands and turns onto his side, pulling his knees to his chest. Tim gently takes Lucas’ arms and urges him closer, coaxing Lucas to lay against his chest as he sobs. Lucas clutches Tim as if he is the only thing left in this world, grabbing onto him like a final thread of sanity, needing Tim like he’s never needed anyone before. Tim gently rubs Lucas’ shaking back, stroking his long hair away from his face, and tenderly holding him still. He whispers soothing nonsense words to the younger man, his voice low and soft, comforting, and quiet. Lucas’ sobbing slowly dies down, but he continues shaking terribly. He holds Tim’s uniform with tight fists, resting his head against his only friend’s shoulder. “I’m cold, Tim.” O’Neill looks up and pulls Lucas’ blanket off of his bunk, wrapping it around Lucas’ shoulders, draping it across the both of them. Lucas closes his eyes and sighs, shuddering. August 12, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- MedBay 10 PM. Hudson walks into the quiet hospital setting, curious as to what’s going on. Several hours ago he heard that Lucas had been admitted in, but no details were given and the answers to the questions he asked made little sense to him. Looking over across the rows of empty beds, Hudson finds that the one on the end is occupied by a slender form, cuddled within several light blankets, asleep. Hudson walks over and smiles at the sleeping young man, Lucas. He’s quiet and calm, lost in a deep, dreamless sleep. He’s not hooked up to any monitors or devices, only an intravenous line in his left arm. “Captain.” Hudson turns, following the soft female voice. Doctor Eliot is across the room, watching Hudson closely. “He’s exhausted. He’s been sleeping for three hours, I have no doubt he won’t wake before tomorrow morning.” Hudson nods thoughtfully. “What happened?” “A massive breakdown. He lapsed into a state and when he finally came out of it, he broke down into hysterical crying. The only person there was Lieutenant O’Neill, and Lucas refused to let him leave his side. Tim was the first person he saw and at that moment he was everything to Lucas. He held onto Tim, I believe, for dear life itself. No one understands how much this kid needs someone, now, more than ever. After what he went through on that island, he needs to talk about it. He came close to it with me, but he didn’t give me details. He’s living in flashbacks and hallucinations which _no one_ can take away from him unless _he_ can confide in someone first. We can’t force that person on him, he has to choose _them_.” Hudson sighs deeply. “Is there _any_ way we can help him?” “The most we can do now,” She gazes at Lucas. “is let him know how much we care about him, and how much we all want him to get better.” End Part Five. Copyright Kathleen Brown, September 1997. ---------------------------------------- Return-path: Resent-date: Mon, 22 Sep 1997 16:53:06 -0500 (CDT) Date: Mon, 22 Sep 1997 17:10:28 -0400 Resent-from: seaQuest-ff-request@escapenet.org From: Kathleen Wolenczak Subject: (sQ-ff) Pinni 2 6 Resent-sender: seaQuest-ff-request@escapenet.org To: FF-List Reply-to: seaQuest-ff@escapenet.org Resent-message-id: <"ERVHnD.A.RDD.BjuJ0"@stgenesis.org> X-MSMail-Priority: Normal X-Mailing-List: archive/latest/36 X-Loop: seaQuest-ff@stgenesis.org X-MIME-Autoconverted: from 8bit to quoted-printable by stgenesis.org id QAA12504 X-Proc-type: 3 Anything not copyright Amblin/Universal/Scifi is copyright me. Part Six. September 8, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Lieutenant Tim O’Neill’s Quarters. 5 PM. Tim is sitting on his bed, quietly writing in a leather-bound book, a journal which he has been keeping for the past several months, since before Lucas left for training at Coronado. “Sometimes it’s too much to take to simply watch him nowadays. He sits alone at mealtimes, he hardly speaks, and when he does, he smiles slightly, trying to put up a brave front for all of us. I wish he’d scream or laugh or just beg out loud for the company he so desperately craves and shyly hints at every second, just to let us know that he’s still in there, instead of always trying to sit in the background, alone. Sometimes he’ll come to me and sit in silence, listening to me ramble about something or another. I’ll look over and see him sitting, so patiently, waiting for his turn to speak. I’ll go over and apologize and tell him to go ahead and speak, but he’ll simply shake his head sadly and wrap his arms around me and I can feel him shivering underneath his uniform. I’ve never seen _anyone_ who so wanted to feel another human being. He fights his tears, trying to hold them back, he doesn’t want to cry in front of me or anyone else. He never complains about it, never asks for anything more than food and warmth and the company of another, and sometimes not even that. There are days when I think he wants to be alone so that he can punish himself for wanting so much from us, but he couldn’t be more wrong. What he wants, and what we’re willing to give...the difference is in the thousands. He asks for a single second of attention, we’re willing to give him all the time in the world. Everyone feels the way I do, everyone is worried and terrified for him.” Tim stops a long, thoughtful moment, then keeps writing. “Lucas asked me yesterday if I would mind it if he considered me his best friend. I told him of course not and he seemed _so_ happy.... I mean, he’s such a scared kid, and he’s so alone, with so few real friends, I would honestly feel _honored_ to be thought of as Lucas’ best friend. It must be so awfully important to him to have someone he trusts indefinitely. It’s so easy to tell him everything there is about me, I know he’d never tell any of my secrets (as if I had any), and he’d never abandon me, never hurt me. It amazes me that people who are mass murderers and serial rapists blame all their problems on their parents or their bosses or abuse as a child. Yes, all that pain is real, but here we have a young man who’s been abandoned by his parents, neglected, and hurt, had his dream ripped away, his mind torn to shreds, his future blown to hell and back, and still...he couldn’t hurt anyone if he wanted to, and all he wants is to be loved. He has no bitterness, no anger towards the Navy, no manic need to kill...he just wants to love and be loved. There’s nothing wrong with that.... But yet all those lunatics and attention-craving psychopaths are trivializing Lucas’ pain. It isn’t fair.” Tim sighs deeply, pushes at his hair. “Where was I? Oh.... we have shore leave tomorrow. I asked Lucas if he wanted to go out and do something fun, but he declined, saying he’d rather be alone. I want to be with him, make sure he’s all right, but I guess he can handle things on his own since Doctor Eliot all ready cleared him. I’m just worried, I suppose.” Tim thinks another moment, ready to end this entry, but he smiles and writes another sentence. “I have another date with Terri tonight....” September 9, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Captain Hudson’s Quarters 8 AM Hudson walks from the head, in uniform, getting ready for the day ahead. There’s a knock at his door and, looking back, he sees it’s Tony. He motions absently for him to come in. “Sir, I’ve got a problem. I need your advice.” Hudson grins. “Don’t we all.... Sit.” Piccolo sits at Hudson’s table, uncomfortable. Hudson sits opposite him. “What is it?” “I got a friend---” “Oh, I hate these, just cut to the chase....” “No, Sir, I was....” Hudson looks at him. “You see, a friend of mine asked me to do something for him that I don’t agree with, and not only is it against what _I_ believe in, it’s also illegal.” Hudson raises his eyebrows. “I know that’s never stopped me before, Sir, but this is _really_ illegal.” Hudson’s really concerned now, as well as suspicious. “Well, what did he ask you to do?” “He asked me to get ‘im a prostitute, Sir.” Hudson nearly flips, so Tony speaks quickly. “He’s not a bad guy, Sir, just really lonely, and he only wants the company for shore leave. He’d never do anything with anybody like that, I just think he’s too scared to ask anybody on seaQuest to spend any time with ‘im.” Hudson sighs deeply and traces his fingertips across his forehead. “Let me guess, this friend, short blonde hair, blue eyes, five-foot-nine, on the thin side?” Tony nods, ashamed. “Sir, he’d never....” Hudson nods slowly. “I know, Tony. But he could get in real trouble for doing something like this, and it definitely won’t be good for him. Just...” Hudson thinks. “Just tell him you won’t do it. Offer to go with him.” “Sir, I tried that, but he won’t let me.” “Then just refuse to do it. If he still tries it, which I don’t think he will, it won’t be your fault.” “But I’d be a horrible friend..._letting_ him get hurt like that...” Tony shakes his head slowly, very much distraught. “Tony, we’ve got to stop protecting him all the time. He needs to get back out there and he can’t do that if we’re hovering over him every moment.” Tony nods, sighing. September 9, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Launch Bay 5:56 PM Tony’s waiting along with everyone else for permission to board the shuttle. Lucas walks in, dressed in a sweater and jeans, quiet as usual. He walks over to Tony. “Did you do what I asked, Tony?” Tony looks at him. “No.” “But you promised...” “No, Lucas. I didn’t do it and I won’t do it. I’m sorry. It isn’t right and I can’t be a part of it.” Lucas pleads desperately with Tony. “I can’t do this by myself, Tony.” “I’m sorry.” Lucas turns and runs out, tears pouring down his face. He runs down the corridor to his quarters, slamming the door shut, hard. He walks to his closet and opens the sliding door, peeling off his sweater and pulling out his khaki uniform. End Part Six. Copyright Kathleen Brown, September 1997. ---------------------------------------- seaQuest-ff-request@stgenesis.org Subject: unsubscribe Resent-date: Wed, 24 Sep 1997 18:29:27 -0500 (CDT) Date: Wed, 24 Sep 1997 18:53:40 -0400 Resent-from: seaQuest-ff-request@escapenet.org From: Kathleen Wolenczak Subject: (sQ-ff) Pinni 2 7 Resent-sender: seaQuest-ff-request@escapenet.org To: FF-List Reply-to: seaQuest-ff@escapenet.org X-Mailer: Microsoft Internet Mail 4.70.1161 X-MSMail-Priority: Normal X-Mailing-List: archive/latest/55 X-Loop: seaQuest-ff@stgenesis.org X-MIME-Autoconverted: from 8bit to quoted-printable by stgenesis.org id SAA17760 X-Proc-type: 3 Guys, this carries some pretty heavy ELFing and bloodshed... Anything not copyright Amblin/Universal/Scifi is copyright me. Part Seven. September 9, 2033 New Cape Quest, FL -- Bar 8: 24 PM Dressed in his khakis, Lucas is there, alone in a sea of strangers, drinking a non-alcoholic cocktail with enough of a bite to seem alcoholic, lost in thought. A woman comes over, thick, shiny, long black hair, a slim figure, and a gentle smile. “SEAL?” Lucas looks at her, confused. “I noticed you were wearing a SEAL’s pin.” Lucas nods softly. “I went through Hell, if that’s what you’re asking.” “But you’re not a SEAL?” He shakes his head slowly. “I was hurt on a -- _in_ -- a training exercise....” She nods knowingly, leaning on the seat beside him. He watches her dispassionately. “Oh, I’m a nurse at the Naval Hospital here. I’ve treated a few SEALs. Tough sons of bitches....” She trails off, smiling. Lucas smiles slightly. “You ever seen life on Coronado?” “I’ve heard....” She looks at him. With his sad, sad eyes and ever- so-gentle demeanor, he’s just begging for her to help him. “Wanna tell me about it?” He looks at her as if to say ‘Really?! You’ll let me?!’ and nods softly. She nods and smiles. “Most officers do. C’mon, then...let’s take a walk.” Lucas smiles and walks out with her. September 9, 2033 Atlantic Coastline of Southern Florida 11 PM Lucas is walking down the beach, in the middle of his softly-spoken narrative of life on Coronado. “And what they’ll do is, you’ll be in the middle of a class on weapons or tactical or something, a class that has _absolutely_ no strenuous physical component in, and they’ll take you down to the shoreline and make you sit in the ocean while the waves crash down on you and it is _so_ cold. You’ll sit there for a half hour or so and they’ll take you out, make you exercise, and then make you go back in the water.....” Lucas loses his pattern of thought, thinking back to that time. She nods thoughtfully. “Surf torture.” He looks at her, surprised. “You’ve heard of it?” “You’d be surprised what sick men will say when they’ve got a high fever. Most of it’s delusions, though, and no one’s ever spoken like you do. You’re so sad about it...” she looks deeply into his eyes. “It’s scary. You feel like you’re gonna die and it’s so cold your hands and feet and _everything_ goes numb....” She nods softly. Lucas continues his description. “When they’re done doing that, they’ll line you on the beach and do a med check, which is hardly anything more than a glance, a check for concussion, and one or two questions about how you feel.” He shrugs. “Did you ever fail any? I mean, with your wrist. And the pneumonia...” “They didn’t catch my pneumonia in an exam, I had to go to them to get attention on that, and as long as I didn’t complain about my wrist they didn’t care.” “Why didn’t you complain? It had to have hurt you terribly.” “Yeah, it hurt, but I didn’t want to get sent home. I’d never give up on being a SEAL, and I know I couldn’t’ve made it through there twice....” Lucas sighs deeply and stares off. “I only failed one check. With a concussion.” “How’d that happen?” Lucas sighs deeply and loses himself in thought. * On Coronado, Lucas is sitting in a makeshift Vietnam-era bamboo- type hut on a wooden chair, his hands tied behind his back. He’s exhausted, in a military T-shirt and many-pocketed camouflage pants, sweating. He glares as Haskill, who is making an attempt at getting information from Lucas. Haskill is pacing across the room, Lucas is hot and almost falling asleep. Haskill steps forward and slaps Lucas across the face. Lucas looks at him. “Get up, you little sonofabitch. How dare you fall asleep during one of _my_ interrogations.” “And it’s just moving a mile-a-minute, I’m having trouble keeping up.” Haskill grabs Lucas’ shirt and holds him close to his face. “Shut up.” “But I thought you wanted me to talk?” Haskill throws Lucas back into the shaky chair, ready to get this interrogation started. “What’s your name?” “Luke.” “Last name?” “Skywalker.” Haskill smacks Lucas, who is surprised he was able to keep a straight face through that...it always upset him no one had ever asked his name in one of his many previous hostage situations. Haskill grabs Lucas again, with both hands this time. “Where are you from?” “Hyperion.” Haskill pulls a knife from his belt, holding it to Lucas’ groin. Lucas pulls back, his eyes wide in fear. “Don’t cut off anything I haven’t had a chance to use yet, _please_!” “Where is the rest of your shore party?!” “I don’t know!!” “Sure you do, Luke. Now tell me.” “I don’t know.” Lucas looks at him, trying to see if he believes him. “I swear to God, I don’t; get that away from me!!” Haskill pulls the knife away and holds it instead to the pulsing, thick vein in Lucas’ throat. Surprisingly, he’s less nervous. *Better to be dead than mangled for life, ‘eh?* “Tell me where they are, Lieutenant. I know you know.” “Hey, I _swear_, I don’t.” “There are ways I can use where you’d tell me in a second flat... I just like it _so_ much better this way.” Lucas sighs deeply. Haskill cuts Lucas’ forehead, slowly. Blood dribbles from the wound, oozing down Lucas’ pale skin. Tears spring to Lucas’ eyes, but he fights against his pain and fear, using it for him, making himself stronger with it. “Where is your boat, Lieutenant?” “The ocean?” Haskill punches Lucas in the mouth, knocking one of his teeth nearly free from his tender gums, filling Lucas’ mouth with thick red blood. “Tell me!!!” Lucas spits his blood onto the floor, it dribbles down his chin, mixing with saliva. “My parents paid a _lot_ of money for two years of braces. You got a lawsuit on your hands, buddy.” Haskill reaches behind Lucas and grabs his bandaged right wrist. He twists it, slowly. “Tell me, Lieutenant.....tell me...... it’ll get so much worse.” Lucas winces in agony. He spits blood onto Haskill. Haskill bends Lucas’ hand far back, allowing it to meet his forearm until it can go no further. The motion is quick, and Lucas screams in horrible, horrible pain. He slides off the chair, onto his knees on the floor. He falls forward onto his chest, trying to get away from the pain...the God-awful pain.... * Lucas looks up at his companion, finding himself on the beach in Florida, the agony reduced to a dull, further-fading ache. Those dark chocolate eyes are gazing at him lovingly, concerned for him out of love, not obligation. It reminds Lucas of Tim, his one other honest friend. Lucas sighs and shakes his head softly. “I’m sorry....I don’t even know your name.... I’m Lucas Wolenczak.” “Amanda Secare.” “Hi.” Lucas nearly blushes and gently takes her hand, holding it in the curve of his own cold grasp. “It’s freezing out here. Let’s go warm up someplace.” Lucas nods absently, shivering as he realizes. Amanda smiles at him. “I know where we can get a decent cup of coffee. Is that okay?” “Sure....” They walk off. Lucas is shy. “I didn’t notice the cold.” “You’re shivering.” She wraps her arm around him, and he wraps his arm around her in the same manner. It is in this way which they walk to the friendly little coffeeshop on the other side of the street. There they choose a seat from which they may watch the sunrise, having spent the whole night talking. End Part Seven. Copyright Kathleen Brown, September 1997. ---------------------------------------- seaQuest-ff-request@stgenesis.org Subject: unsubscribe Resent-date: Wed, 24 Sep 1997 18:29:24 -0500 (CDT) Date: Wed, 24 Sep 1997 18:53:16 -0400 Resent-from: seaQuest-ff-request@escapenet.org From: Kathleen Wolenczak Subject: (sQ-ff) Pinni 2 8 Resent-sender: seaQuest-ff-request@escapenet.org To: FF-List Reply-to: seaQuest-ff@escapenet.org X-Mailer: Microsoft Internet Mail 4.70.1161 X-MSMail-Priority: Normal X-Mailing-List: archive/latest/54 X-Loop: seaQuest-ff@stgenesis.org X-MIME-Autoconverted: from 8bit to quoted-printable by stgenesis.org id SAA17734 X-Proc-type: 3 Anything not copyright Amblin/Universal/Scifi is copyright me. Part Eight. September 10, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- Launch Bay 8:16 AM The hydraulic doors open and Lucas walks down the stairs into the room, facing Hudson in Navy stoicism, but his eyes show how deathly afraid he is. Hudson looks very dissatisfied by Lucas’ truancy. “Where were you, Lieutenant?” “On leave, Sir. I am under no obligation to tell you where I was or with whom I shared my company.” “You _do_ realize you’re AWOL, don’t you?” “By sixteen minutes, Sir, but, if you’d like me to prove it to you, I was in seaQuest’s port by o-eight-hundred hours, Sir. You shoved off early and I was under obligation to bring the Stinger back to port aboard the boat, Sir.” “You didn’t compensate for the time it takes to accomplish that task, Lieutenant?” “No, Sir. I didn’t have the time.” “What was it exactly that was so much more important than your duties that caused you to forget that detail, Mr. Wolenczak?” “I was out all night, Sir. I haven’t slept for nearly thirty-six hours, so I think you should know that my obligations were important enough for me to miss a full night’s sleep as well.” “Were your obligations of a medical, military, or personal nature?” “Personal and medical, Sir.” “Oh?” “I spent the night with a nurse from the Naval hospital. We conducted a sort of impromptu therapy session the entire night.” “Basically you just spent the while night talking.” “Yes, Sir.” Hudson smiles. “Did everything go well?” Lucas smiles tentatively. “Yes, Sir.” “Good, then. Go down to your quarters and take a break. You can have your next shift off if you so desire.” “I do desire it, Sir. Thank you, Sir.” “Dismissed, Lieutenant.” Lucas smiles, his gratefulness written all over his face. He leaves quietly. As Lucas steps into the hallway, Piccolo bounds over, bursting with energy. “Hey!” Lucas smiles. He’s visibly tired, but it’s been worse and he’s grown accustomed to the sleep deprivation. “Hey.” “Where you been, Lucas? I notice not _only_ are you dressed in the same clothes you wore last night, but, you also are coming home past curfew. That’s only happened one other time, and, well....” “Yes, Tony, I met somebody, no, Tony, I didn’t do anything.” Lucas grins. “Sorry if that disappoints you.” “Don’t worry, it doesn’t. Is she pretty?” Lucas nods, growing dreamy at the very thought of her. “Wow, you’ve really fallen for her, haven’t you?” Lucas nods, blushing, and pushing at his hair in the hopes Tony won’t notice _that_ badly. Tony does, though, and grins happily. He suddenly remembers his other piece of news. “Oh!! Lucas, guess what?!” “Hell froze over while I was gone?” “Ha ha. No, Tim got engaged!!” Lucas stares at Tony. His expression is unreadable. Happy, sad, sick, estatic, having a stroke, you can’t tell, it’s _completely_ unreadable. His voice is soft. “Oh my God.... Wow.... Oh my God....” Lucas walks down the hallway almost in a trance. He stops and turns, startled when he finds Tony tagging along. “I gotta go talk to him. See you later, Tony.” Lucas leaves down a small hallway, pushing passed crewmembers. He approaches Tim’s quarters, near-wild with terror. Before he gets a chance to knock, the door is flung open and Tim smiles at Lucas. He takes him in a firm embrace, but when he feels Lucas’ hesitation, he pulls away. “Where have you been?” “Why didn’t you tell me you were gonna do this?” Tim’s sighs and shrugs. “I don’t know. It was kind of spur-of-the- moment.” Lucas sighs and walks into Tim’s quarters, sitting on his bed, stunned. It is only now when his expression betrays his sadness. “I thought you’d be happy for me.” Lucas looks up. “I _am_ happy for you, but I’m just.....” He sighs. “Who am I gonna have anymore? You’re gonna get married and leave and retire and, Tim, who am I gonna have left? Yeah, I’ll have Amanda, but she won’t be _here_ like you are...” “Wait a second, Lucas.” Tim sits beside the younger man. “Who’s Amanda?” Lucas speaks wearily, knowing he’ll have to explain this a thousand times to the over two hundred people on seaQuest. “The girl I met last night. The reason I am just coming home _now_.” Tim smiles and is estatic. “That’s great!” “Not if she’s just here to take your place.” “Lucas, no one can replace me, you know that.” Lucas manages a grin. “C’mon, I have no intention of actually _getting_ married just yet. It’s gonna be a long engagement. It’ll be okay, I’ll be here for you, whenever you need me, no matter what.” Lucas looks at Tim with his sad blue eyes, wondering if he can believe Tim. “I promise, Lucas.” Lucas nods and wraps his arms around Tim in a warm hug. “Thank you, Tim...” Tim smiles. Lucas sits back and grins. “So tell me all about it, what happened?!” Tim smiles and starts talking excitedly, Lucas listens with an enrapt expression on his face and a slight smile. End Part Eight. Copyright Kathleen Brown, September 1997. Go To Part 9 ---------------------------------------- seaQuest-ff-request@stgenesis.org Subject: unsubscribe Resent-date: Wed, 24 Sep 1997 18:29:31 -0500 (CDT) Date: Wed, 24 Sep 1997 18:55:02 -0400 Resent-from: seaQuest-ff-request@escapenet.org From: Kathleen Wolenczak Subject: (sQ-ff) Pinni 2 9 End Resent-sender: seaQuest-ff-request@escapenet.org To: FF-List Reply-to: seaQuest-ff@escapenet.org X-Mailer: Microsoft Internet Mail 4.70.1161 X-MSMail-Priority: Normal X-Mailing-List: archive/latest/56 X-Loop: seaQuest-ff@stgenesis.org X-MIME-Autoconverted: from 8bit to quoted-printable by stgenesis.org id SAA17791 X-Proc-type: 3 Anything not copyright Amblin/Universal/Scifi is copyright me. Epilogue. September 25, 2033 seaQuest DSV 4600 II -- MedBay 10:03 AM Lucas is sitting quietly, waiting. Doctor Eliot comes in and smiles, closing the door and sitting in front of Lucas. She smiles gently. “How ya’ doin’?” Lucas sighs deeply. “I’m lonely.” Doctor Eliot nods softly, leaning forward and gently touching Lucas’ knee. Lucas looks at her and then looks around the room, nervous. “Tim’s being great, same as always, but I think it’s more me now, I think I’m just worried about what’s going on. I’ve never been engaged but I’d like to think that when I am I’ll share everything, and I don’t want him telling Terri all about me.” “Tim would _never_ betray your trust.” “Not to anybody on _seaQuest_, no, but he’d tell her and I don’t want her thinking I’m some sort of a headcase.” Doctor Eliot looks at Lucas, reprimanding him with no more than a smile. “You know that isn’t true.” “What_ever_...” Lucas looks away, wanting to move on and get away from this topic of conversation. “How have you been doing, Lucas? Talk about yourself.” Over the past several weeks, turning into months, Doctor Eliot’s learned more about Lucas’ shy ways, his tendency to hold things inside for months after the fact, when all but him have forgotten. He uses these things, stupid little happenings, against himself, causing himself pain unequaled to any anyone else can give him. He turns his tiny mistakes into life-shattering events, when, in truth, they shatter no life but his own. Lucas’ soft, sorrowful sighs are a lengthy narrative of his pain and sadness, each one signaling something wrong within him. “I’m finally sleeping better, and the anti-anxiety stuff you gave me is really helping out.” Doctor Eliot nods softly, smiling. This young man would be a nervous wreck without the medication, and it’s one of the only things keeping him on board _seaQuest_. “How’re you doing starting exercise again? You’re not overdoing it, are you?” “No. I’m a little too sore to do that.” He manages an understated smile. “I’m doing all right. It feels good to be moving around again.” She nods, making a note. “Are you enjoying the journal I gave you?” “Oh yes....” He smiles “Tons. It’s something more to fill my time with. Oh, did I tell you? I hacked the UEO a few days ago. Didn’t see much.” He shrugs, grinning. Though she’d normally frown on such behavior, she smiles at him, knowing that it’s important for him to go back to something he’s confident in. “Anything else?” “No, but I just want to thank you, you’re being really great about me; dealing with how much of a pain I know I can be. But I think I’m really doing better, considering all the medications and therapy. Without you, I’m scared to think of it.” He looks down at his hands, afraid he’ll look stupid for saying it. Doctor Eliot touches his hand gently. “You’re welcome. I was _happy_ to treat someone like you.” “Someone like me?” “So open and ready to love, even though you know full well you could get hurt.... People aren’t usually so gentle after something like this, they get angry and cold toward everyone, and no amount of therapy can change it. You did exactly the opposite, and I’m so happy to be given the chance to help you get better. For the last few months _all_ I’ve wanted to do was give you back your life.” She smiles playfully. “And give some pretty girl a shot at a nice guy like you.” Lucas blushes. “So how’s Amanda?” Lucas blushes even harder. The End. Copyright Kathleen Brown, September 1997. ---------------------------------------- seaQuest-ff-request@stgenesis.org Subject: unsubscribe